You're allowed to benefit
January 2025, Edition 1
Welcome to Joanna’s Substack!
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Welcome to my digital magazine, where I am bringing to you all the elements of skill, snippets of wisdom and heartfelt learnings to truly LIVE your life. Here’s where you are most empowered to “take what you want, and leave the rest.” Not all advice I give will apply to you. If you know someone who could use the concepts I’m sharing…share it.
What to expect?
There will be various columns throughout the month covering topics as it relates to relationships, career and life. My hope is that you choose courage over conformity wherever you can.
I envision you grabbing a cup of coffee and taking a moment to read a column, pause, ponder and come back to relevant sections. I hope it stays in your inbox to revisit when you need a shift, a boost or a perspective change. Plus, you can always come into Substack to read previous editions. This isn’t another place to receive loads of emails.
You don’t mass produce depth.
It’s gentler than that.
These topics are thoughtfully curated, and of course, you can leave comments, and send questions to “ask Joanna,” for future editions. Maybe someday I’ll have a physical magazine you can get shipped to you (I’m dreaming over here, and the phrase I keep saying, “create your way there.”
Last year, I was envisioning what I wanted to do. I saw myself, sitting at a coffee shop, headphones on 🎧, and writing emails. So here we are.
I love writing them, I love your replies and believe life unfolds beautifully like a flower. I’m learning to harness the force of life instead of resist, wear myself out, and strive my way to any success or achievement. Any achievers in the car? 🚗😅📈
So with that, welcome to the first edition ma’lady 🎩.
For future editions, premium subscribers will receive access to the full edition + voice notes and exclusive content.
I hope you’ll join me. 🌲🚗
For “Ask Joanna,” please submit requests to hello@joannadahlseid.com.
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In this week’s negotiation edition we explore how guilt is playing a role in this Stay-at-Home-Mom’s decisions within her divorce settlement. This question came from my 2 Week Divorce Negotiation Intensive where I help folks navigate divorce from high ground with negotiation and communication refinement.
“I initiated the divorce and he is really struggling with it. He is wanting to fix things, and I’m done. I worry in my negotiations that the guilt over how poorly he is doing will show through, and my weakness will cost me. Part of me also feels I don’t deserve more than half because I initiated things, even though he put no effort into the marriage, making it absolutely intolerable at the end. How do I work through this? Mediation is next week. I have been in therapy for 3 years, and see her the day before mediation so hoping that helps too. “
Perhaps the beliefs are:
“If I ask for less, I won’t feel as guilty, and my ex won’t be in as much pain.”
”I can rescue someone from natural consequences.”
“I can take less because I asked for this.”
“It’s his career, he earned it, and I didn’t.”
“I don’t deserve it.”
PSA: You’re allowed to benefit from the agreements you’re making.
Guilt says “I did something wrong and I need to fix it.”
Let’s unravel this ⬇️